Fiction Friday: The Wrath of Khan, Spoofed (Part One)

My recent explorations through the Star Trek universe on The Great Khan Adventure have reminded me of some writing I once did, long ago and far away…  I don’t remember exactly when anymore, but I think it was the first year or two of high school.  I decided it would be fun to spoof the Star Trek movies.  Mostly I spoofed the bad ones (you know which they are), but I had some fun with The Wrath of Khan too.

I don’t claim that this is deep or insightful or even great literature (and it’s not proper screenwriting format either) but you may find it amusing…  Oh, and fanfiction disclaimer, I don’t own any of the characters, etc., etc.

STAR TREK II: THE SOMEWHAT PERTURBED REACTION AND SUBSEQUENT ACTIVITIES OF KHAN

[The bridge of a starship; a young Vulcan woman named Saavik is in command]

Communications officer: We’re picking up a distress call from the Kobayashi Maru.  They need help, but they’re in the Klingon neutral zone.

Saavik: Hmm.  If we enter, we could very easily start an intergalactic war, with dire consequences for the entire galaxy.  Logically, we should not enter.   I am a Vulcan.  Therefore, I should be logical.  [considers] I think I’ll enter anyway.

Navigator: Klingon ships approaching.

Saavik: Oops.

[Battle ensues.  When the smoke clears, Saavik’s ship is destroyed.  Fortunately, this turns out to be just a test on the holodeck.  Kirk enters through a broken wall, looking very impressive silhouetted against the light.]

Kirk: Nice work, Cadet Saavik.

Saavik: The ship blew up.  Everyone died.

Kirk: Don’t worry!  That was supposed to happen.

Saavik: That’s illogical.  Also pretty stupid. Continue reading “Fiction Friday: The Wrath of Khan, Spoofed (Part One)”

Fiction Friday: Into the Forest with the Storyteller

Long-time readers may remember that in 2011, I wrote a retelling of “The Twelve Dancing Princesses” for NaNoWriMo.  Recent readers of The Wanderers have also met those princesses from another angle.  That NaNo novel is in the process of growing up into The Storyteller and Her Sisters, the companion novel to The Wanderers that I plan to publish in the fall of 2014.  I’ve been working on revisions this past week, so an excerpt seemed appropriate.

In this early scene, Lyra (the narrator and the Storyteller of the title) and her eleven sisters have gone exploring beneath their father’s castle…

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A hundred yards along the tunnel, we reached the Gate.  The Gate was a great beast of iron bars and curling decorations, cutting across the tunnel, blocking the path to anything beyond it.  Vira’s candlelight didn’t reach far enough to show anything but more tunnel on the other side.  There was a lion’s head molded into the top of the Gate, and I had never been able to escape the feeling that it was looking at us.  I’d never seen it move, unless you count one very disturbing dream.

For fourteen years, the Gate hadn’t moved at all, not even the rational way gates are supposed to move when someone tries to open them.  There wasn’t any sign of a lock, but the Gate simply wouldn’t shift no matter how we pushed.  Not even a wobble.

Until the night in question.  Mina, the first to push, thought she felt it move.  The rest of us gathered around, and the more of us who tried, the more it seemed to sway and give.  Finally, when all twelve of us took hold of a bar and pushed, the gate swung neatly open, like two wings sweeping to either side.

You may not be surprised.  For us, it could hardly have been more shocking if a blank wall in our bedroom had opened.  Even though we kept trying the Gate, we were very used to the idea that it was never going to open.  I turned to Talya next to me and grinned.  She bit her lip and gave only a half-smile in response.

“Now what?” Laina said, the first to break the silence that followed the Gate opening.  The amount of detail in our plans for this eventuality had about matched our expectations of it actually happening.

“Let’s go back,” Talya said, wrapping her arms around herself.  “Let’s close the Gate and go back.  It’s dangerous through there, you all know that.”

“Our whole lives are dangerous,” Laina said.  I could see my own excitement reflected in the gleam in her eyes.  “We have to risk this.  It’s the best chance at escape we’ve ever had.”

“It may mean something that the Gate finally opened,” Mina pointed out.  “Magical things rarely happen randomly, and if a magic door opens it only makes sense to go through it.”

“But you know what could happen,” Talya whispered.

“We’ve talked about this from every angle for years,” Laina groaned, “are we really going to do it again now?  We’ve always agreed that it would be worth the risk if we ever had the chance.  Besides, it was all right for Mother so it can’t be that dangerous.”

“Laina’s right,” Vira said, raising the candle higher.  “In all practical ways, we decided this a long time ago.  So let’s go on and see if it’s how we remember it.”

I didn’t remember it, at least not with any certainty that I wasn’t just imagining memories.  But Vira had been ten years old, fourteen years before.  She remembered.

We all went through the Gate, Talya clutching my hand again, though even she had given a reluctant nod in the end to going forward.  I squeezed her fingers tightly, but for me it was anticipation, not dread.  I had been hearing about this my whole life.  I had always wanted to see it for myself.  It was like an adventure, like one of my stories.  People in stories didn’t turn back because the adventure was dangerous.

Beyond the Gate, we quickly didn’t need Vira’s candle anymore.  Around two more turns in the tunnel, it opened up into a broad cavern.  Shortly beyond the tunnel’s mouth, we came to the forest.  The trees were set out in an orchard of orderly rows, and the trunks of every tree shone like moonlight, casting a shimmering light throughout the cavern.  Above the trunks, the branches and the leaves were silver.

I don’t mean they were gray, or resembled silver, or were some variety of tree with silver in its name.  I mean they were silver.  They looked like some kind of elm, but made of a glittering metal.

It wasn’t a surprise.  Vira had remembered the trees, and so had a few others of my oldest sisters.  Hearing about it and seeing it, that’s two very different things.  Somehow, I had never quite believed in this forest until I saw it myself.  Talya’s hand got tighter around mine.

We slowly walked down a wide pathway between two lines of trees.  The trees grew up out of the cavern floor, and if they had ever shed a leaf, it wasn’t visible on the bare rock around them.  Mostly I was looking up.  I stared at those silver leaves above us, and almost without my noticing, my thoughts began to drift towards all that I could buy with just a few branches.

I wanted to keep looking at the silver trees, but at the head of our group, Vira kept pushing onwards.  Long instinct made us all follow her, and soon the moonlight-like silver forest gave way to a brighter stretch of trees.  These trees shone like sunlight.  These trees were made of gold.

They glittered and shone and enticed.  With a handful of these leaves, I could buy dresses and jewelry and shoes…  I blinked, momentarily confused.  I didn’t even like shoes very much.  It was Nila who was obsessed with clothes, not me.  And yet I suddenly wanted gold, lots of it, to buy piles and mountains of beautiful things.  So many beautiful things.

The gold trees ended too, and a third forest began.  This one glittered like starlight.  This one had trees made of diamonds.  I looked at the nearest branch, seeing delicate sprays of flowers and buds, crusted with shining stones.  A single branch had enough diamonds to make necklaces for all twelve of us.

With that kind of wealth, I could do anything.  I could buy castles and horses and armies…and books, I could buy so many books…and entire countries if I wanted to…and I wouldn’t need anyone, not Vira, not Mina, not Talya…

I was still holding Talya’s hand.  I looked down at our hands, then looked at her face.  She was staring up at the diamond trees with a mesmerized expression.  I looked around at my sisters.  Vira and Laina, their expressions were grim.  Mina and Rayna looked confused, as confused as I was feeling.  The rest looked entranced.

I was thinking thoughts that I knew I wouldn’t think.  Buying books, that was me.  That was a constant wish.  But buying armies, buying countries?  And while I sometimes (all right, often) wished to not be dependent on my sisters, the thought had had a nasty undercurrent to it that I didn’t recognize.

I should have recognized what was going on right away, but knowing the theory of something doesn’t always help when experiencing the reality, especially when the nature of that reality is to twist a person’s thoughts.

There was something very wrong with those forests.  They were beautiful.  And they were poison.  And it was an indication of how strong they were that they had pulled us in, made me completely forget the danger for a few moments, even though we had walked into the forest expecting it.  Vira had remembered the poison too.  It was the results of that poison that had reached into the world above, and had made our lives what they were now.

Fiction Friday: A Sea Serpent and a Prince

I haven’t done a Fiction Friday in a while, and since I’ve been chattering on about my upcoming novel release, The Wanderers, it seemed only appropriate to share an excerpt, no?

This scene is towards the middle of the novel.  Julie, Jasper and talking cat Tom have just made a deal with a Sea Queen, which involves rescuing her sea serpent from Prince Randolph.  Jasper and Tom met Randolph on a previous adventure, and were not impressed.  Not every sentence here will make sense out of context, but I think enough is comprehensible…

Julie, Jasper and Tom exited the water abruptly.  One moment they were skimming along just above the sea floor under the power of the Sea Queen’s magic.  The next, they fell out of a wall of water to land in a heap on wet but not at all submerged sand.  Julie’s hair fell in tangles around her shoulders, and Tom shrank to a third of his former apparent size.

Julie got to her feet, wet skirt clinging to her legs, and looked around.  They were on bare sea floor, in a trench formed by walls of water rising dozens of feet above their heads on either side.  The trench was maybe a hundred feet across, and several times that long, the floor covered in mounds of sand and wilted seaweed.  At the far end, she could see the serpent coiled like an enormous snake, while Randolph stood before it with sword drawn, his back to them.

“Damn,” Jasper remarked.  “He must have a useful enchanted sword.”

“You think he used it to part the ocean?” Julie said.

“Can’t explain it any other way.  Randolph just isn’t that talented on his own.”

If Jasper was right, the sword was giving him a considerable advantage.  Julie didn’t know much about judging the health of giant sea monsters, but she thought it looked ill.  It was snapping at Randolph, but its movements were sluggish.  “It’s probably sick outside the water,” she said.  “So to rescue it, we’ll have to move it back into the sea.”

“You want to move a giant serpent?” Jasper said.  “I’ve seen buildings that were smaller.”

Tom unhelpfully added, “I’ve seen entire towns that were smaller.”

“All right, so maybe we don’t move it,” Julie said, keeping her chin in the air and a positive tone in her voice.  Someone had to be the optimist.  “We’ll move the water back around it.”

Jasper caught the idea and the optimism.  “We get the sword from Randolph, and if he can part water, why can’t we put it back?”

Tom groaned.  “We’re going to get wet again.”

“You can’t get any wetter,” Julie said.  “Come on, let’s go steal a sword.”  Continue reading “Fiction Friday: A Sea Serpent and a Prince”

A Man and a Cat Walk Into a Bar…

I’m always sharing my reading news around here…  Meanwhile in writing news, I’m currently working on three novels–which is making my head spin a little!  Two are at different points in the revision stage, and one is still being planned.  In the midst of all that, naturally the logical thing to do is work on a short story.  Though at least it’s a short story related to one of the novels!

It uses characters from the novel, but the story is meant to exist independently.  I wrote most of it, only to get a bit stuck maybe 75% of the way through.  So I thought I’d toss the first page up here and see if sharing it inspires me to write that last stretch…

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When Jasper and Tom walked into the tavern, they attracted no immediate attention.  It may have looked a little odd when Jasper opened the door for the orange cat and let him walk in first, and even odder when Tom made an efficient line between the tables, chairs and boots directly to the bar, springing up to sit on top of it.  But the tavern’s inhabitants were intent on their drinks and their conversation, and didn’t pay any mind to the newcomers.

Jasper followed Tom to the bar, where the tavernkeeper looked them both over, didn’t comment on the cat on his counter, and just said, “What’ll it be?”

“One ale and a bowl of milk,” Jasper answered, prompting a snicker from his nearest neighbor.

But it wasn’t until Tom said, “And have you got any fish?” that heads starting turning.

Jasper hid his grin behind the mug of ale the tavernkeeper had handed him.  Eventually the fun of shocking people with a talking cat was going to wear off, but after a month of traveling with Tom, it was still amusing him.

“I, uh, yeah, I think we do,” the tavernkeeper managed, staring at the tabby.

“Excellent.”  Tom sat down, sticking his nose in the air with his most regal attitude, plainly aware that the entire room was looking at him.  “One order of fish, please.  Any kind will do, only not too spicy.  Spicy food makes me sneeze.”

“Right,” the tavernkeeper said.  “So…d’you want it raw?”

Tom bristled, tail lashing.  “No, cooked!  What do you think I am, a savage?”

“He thinks you’re a cat,” Jasper pointed out.

“That doesn’t mean I can’t have refined taste.”

Introducing the Twelve Dancing Princesses

Long-time readers may remember that for NaNo 2011, I wrote the first draft of a novel based around the fairy tale of The Twelve Dancing Princesses (or The Shoes That Were Worn to Pieces).  I’ve finally completed a revision of my other major writing project, The Wanderers, and I’m now about a month into revising the princesses’ novel, The Storyteller and Her Sisters.

Since it’s rather occupying my life 🙂 how about an excerpt?  You can read this post if you want more context on the fairy tale, but you don’t really need it.  This is roughly Page 3 of the novel, and begins to introduce some of the principle characters…

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I think the real beginning of the story, for my sisters and me, was the day the Gate opened.

On that day, Vira, the oldest, was twenty-four.  The youngest, Talya, was fifteen.  I was seventeen.  We are each spaced a neat year apart, except for the two sets of twins.

It was evening when the Gate opened, and though that evening proved momentous, I remember little about the day that preceded it.  I assume it was the usual round of embroidery, penmanship and dancing lessons—we are all excellent dancers.  Whatever we did, it had to have been inside my father’s castle.  We were never allowed to leave.  The day no doubt closed with supper in the banquet hall with Father.  Such ran every day.

And in the evening, all my sisters were in our bedroom, brushing hair, pursuing hobbies, and chatting about a thousand different topics.  Rather like most girls, I think—not that I’d had a great deal of experience with a great many girls.  But I had read things.

Twelve of us shared a single bedroom, and there were days when it felt incredibly cramped.  In reality it was a large room, long and with a high ceiling.  There was a door at one end and a fireplace at the other, beds stretching in two rows down the length of the room.  I suppose we didn’t undergo that much hardship in our living conditions—though I defy anyone to share a bedroom with eleven sisters for fourteen years and not come up with a few complaints.

Such as the problem of eternally being interrupted in the good parts of stories. Continue reading “Introducing the Twelve Dancing Princesses”